`Kiss Me, Kill Me, Love Me, Thrill Me. {Karasu}

[Rima Washino]

Stupid school uniforms.

Stupid rigorous homework.

Stupid STUDY HALL.

She sat in the library, at one of the rectangle, wooden desks that were provided for students in the centre. The check-out desk was up front, near the doors, and far from where she was situated. Shelves scanned the walls, in rows, hiding her and the tables themselves, superflous with books galore.

She rested her chin in her hand, simutaniously observing the hard-covered headquarters and its inhabitants mindlessly. Rima, although likable and generally sociable, did not have any friends in study hall. Nor did she wish to sit through a class alone.

And, so, she had escaped to her solitude. The library. However, so far, it seemed like she hadn't gained any friends or companions in here either. Even the Librarian had stepped out for breakfast. It was just her. Her, and her alone...

...which led her to wander amid her thoughts.

How was she expected to find and date a guy here?? That's all her parents have ever wanted, right? As if she was going to abide to their wishes. Much less, to her old fiance, whom she had promised herself she would find again. Given, of course, that he had even been reborn like her. But, then again, perhaps she would be better off not finding him. A part of her wanted to forget about him, never see him again. A part of her soul resented him for what he had done to her in her past life -- for betraying her, and then unconsciously slaughtering her and her kingdom. How could he? How could someone that she had poured her heart out to.. that she had done everything with.. that she had loved so much... done something so proposterous? Something so incredibly void and heartless?

It could be boys in general. She had come to that conclusion, anyway. That all men and boys were, essentially, the same. Decietful. Manipulative. Selfish.

Needless to say, she couldn't picture herself with any other except James. But... if she did find him... who was to say he would even want to reunite with her? Who was to say that she wouldn't attack him in rage? Ever since being awakened, she had wondered about these things. Contemplated, and drilled her head in.

She was beginning to think that she should begin anew. Forget about James. Lead her own life. Find out what she really wanted. Who she was in this life. And, treat the memories as just that -- moving photographs of the past.

Perhaps... that's exactly what she needed.

[Karasu Kuroha]

"Kuroda-san is a bit creepy. Don't you think so?"

"Shh, if you make her too mad, she might put a curse on you!"

Karasu couldn't stand their muffled giggles and mindless chatter anymore, so she stood up in her seat and pushed her chair in. "Excuse me," she mumbled, brushing past the bewildered girls without even a glance. It wasn't like she cared. Well, okay. That's a lie. No one wants to be the outcast. Only her first week here and there were already silly rumors going around. Was it her gloomy aura? Those unsettling crimson eyes? Apparently the witch hunt was alive and well in Japan.

She really didn't understand what her mother liked so much. Despite her blank expression, being judged by strangers miffed her a little.

Normally she would simply ignore them, but... today was different. Her father had called her yesterday. The stupid man tried to pretend he cared. Kara knew better than that. Every time she gave him a chance, it only lead to her getting hurt. So she decided to shut him out once and for all. Did he expect her to forget how he abandoned herself and her mother to start a new family? She had no ill will against her half-sister, but she never wanted to see him or his new wife again.

Silently she cursed it all inside her mind. Her father, this all girls school. This city. Even if it was her mother's hometown, what did it have to do with her?

She finally reached the library door. Though she had only been here a few times, it seemed like a quiet place. Maybe there was something worth reading? Wait. Kara sensed that she wasn't alone. Her crimson eyes turned to the desks and fell upon a brunette sitting at one of the desks, who looked to be about her age or no more than a year older. For some reason she couldn't explain, the girl's aura intrigued her. She wasn't like the others. Trying her best to seem indifferent, like it didn't matter either way to her, she took a seat beside the other girl. There was a brief silence until she spoke.

"Let me guess. You're new here too." she said coolly.

[Rima Washino]

Rima heard the swift air of the chair beside her change and tense before she heard her voice. The brunette glanced over to see who had come to join her. Chocolate eyes instantly met crimson ones, and her expression instantly changed from one of thought to one of surprise and awe. They were so... different. So was the girl herself -- with her ravenous locks and perfect pale complexion to match. She was certainly much better looking than Rima herself, with her oridinary brown hair and brown eyes.

Of course, this sort of thinking caused a delicate pink blush to flower her cheeks. Simply because the girl before her really was quite pretty. And, unlike most conversations of The Eagle's life, the ravenette was the first to speak rather than the brunette herself. Which was... refreshing.

Rima quickly tried to shove the blush away.

"Let me guess. You're new here too."

[/u][/color]

Rima's lips formed a slow smile as curosity began to lurk behind the depths of her eyes. "How did you know?" She half-joked, though the serious part actually wondered how this girl could tell so easily. Or, even, why she had chosen to sit with Rima. Perhaps it was because they were both, seemingly -- being new and all, and Rima, from a weathy background -- outcasts in their own right?

Rima straightened up, allowing both arms, and a free hand, to rest closely before her upon the surface of the table. "What's your name?" She inquired absent-mindedly, not aware of her abrupt verbalisation until late. "I'm Rima," She offered with a cogenial smile and friendly hand to shake, "Rima Washino."

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[Karasu Kuroha]

Karasu shifted under the girl's stare. What, had she heard that stupid rumor? To think it would travel so far this quickly...

No, maybe that wasn't quite it. She detected no malice from the brunette.

So then what? The heat rose on Kara's cheeks as she tried to speak, but it was like her words got stuck in her throat. This was so frustrating. Why was she affected so much? Sure, the girl was really cute, she would give her that, with her brown hair that was a bit longer than her own, and those wide brown eyes -- Wait, what? Only when she was directly addressed by the other girl did she manage to regain her composure. Well, somewhat. "W-Why? That's because you were sitting alone. Obviously." That little stammer there hadn't been intentional. She had to get it together quickly. There was no way she could allow herself to be humiliated like this! Her reputation was bad enough as it was. Not that she cared. At all. How foolish to think so.

Her cheeks were tinted a rosy color as she took the hand offered to her, unable to meet the girl's (who she now knew was called Rima) eyes. "Karasu." she mumbled, softer than she intended to. Great, now she was coming off like some timid girl. Which she most certainly wasn't. However, Rima had a point. What had made Karasu approach her? A gut feeling and... interest? Since when was she interested in her classmates? This was all so out of character for her.

Rima... She silently committed the name to memory for future purposes. Kara had a feeling they would have many more meetings in the future, whether she wanted to or not.

[Rima Washino]

"W-Why? That's because you were sitting alone. Obviously."

[/u][/color]

"Nice.." The Eagle remarked, awe and wonder apparent in her features. That made perfect sense! Why hadn't she thought of that? Of course, Rima had only been joking, but a part of her still felt midly embarressed that she hadn't come to such an evident conclusion. And, she liked the way the girl had bluntly said it, too. Even though she had stammered a bit... which, somehow, seemed a bit different from how the girl had first approached her. It was then, at that moment, Rima, out of curosity, began to wonder why the beginning consonance of the word had been repeated. Had she taken the girl off-guard somehow? Had the girl possibly begun to feel uncomfortable or nervous? The blush was also a factor. Hold on. She was blushing? Why would she be blushing? Had Rima somehow embarressed her, too??

Or... perhaps, Rima was looking too much into the reaction. As she just so happened to seem to do from time to time.

"Karasu."[/u][/color]

"It's great to meet you, Kara-chan!" she responded genuinely, staring at Karasu as she looked away and placing her hand back onto the table. What a lovely name... Rima had always been interested in crows, afterall.

Though, however, after a moment more of thought, she realised that she had not called Karasu by the proper name. She had added the familiar suffix of "-chan" to her name.. Oh, no. What was she doing?! How rude -- she had only met this girl! And, further more, she had also given Karasu the nickname of 'Kara'. Kara. Usually, people only gave nicknames to those that they... were affectionate with. Rima's cheeks turned crimson, heating immensely at the thoughts circulating through her mind. Now it was her turn to stutter. "I-I mean..!" She looked down, hoping it would somehow disipate or hide her blushing. It didn't seem to help. "I mean... if you want to be called 'Kara-chan'..." She fiddled with her thumbs, and hoped that the girl wouldn't take it offensively. It seemed that Rima was making a friend here, at this new school. She most certainly wouldn't want to ruin a possible kinship, right? And, somehow... deep inside... without consciously realising it... The Eagle had a feeling that the future relation between herself and this girl would be deeper than all of the most powerful friendships combined.
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[Karasu Kuroha]

"Thanks... I guess." Karasu muttered in a hushed voice. This girl was so easy to impress. Even a dense person could figure it out. Still, that was cute in its own way. Wait, wait, wait. Since when did she think of other girls as "cute?" The rosy color on her cheeks remained as she tried to banish the strange thoughts. Of course, she failed. Damn, this is bothersome. The Raven thought with mild irritation. This wasn't like her. Her normal self never cared about anyone but her mother and animals. Her past self had been a warmer person, but that was the past and she was in the present. Besides, Kara wasn't sure if she could return to being that way even if she wanted to.

Yet here she was, taking an interest in someone. Could it be that side of her didn't fade away completely? "Tch," she clicked her tongue, adjusting her ribbon. As if she was going to let herself be weak again! Her blush only deepened at the brunette's next words. How friendly. Forward, even. Karasu wasn't sure if she liked it or not. "Whatever you want. It doesn't matter... to me." She lowered her head so that her face was shadowed by her bangs. As long as she didn't raise her head again, the other girl couldn't see her pitiful expression.

Her mother's words on her first day of school rang in her head. Give your classmates a chance. Kara scoffed. They were the ones who had judged her before even getting to know her. But... Rima seemed different somehow. She sensed a deep pain inside the girl, which intrigued her. Then again, everyone has their stories and Karasu had no intentions to pry. Maybe it's just wishful thinking... but she wanted to believe Rima was trustworthy. Always being the loner was just that -- lonely.

She didn't want to be like that forever.

Kara lifted her head a little, a faint smile playing on her lips. "That is, I don't mind."

[Rima Washino]

"Thanks... I guess."

"Your welcome," She replied, nonchatlantly, paying close attention to her reactions. This girl, er, Kara-chan Karasu-san, was still blushing. And the way that she spoke... could it be that she was shy? But, her first action told otherwise. She had been the one to come over to Rima and strike up conversation, so Rima ruled shyness out. Was she.. embarressed? No, it didn't seem quite like embarressment. Maybe she was just.... nervous? Though, what about, Rima could never be sure.

"Tch," "Whatever you want. It doesn't matter... to me."

[/u][/color]

Rima blinked, a bit shocked at the girl's passive reaction. Of course, she seemed like that sort of soul anyway... but, still. She hadn't expected that from her. And, because she hadn't, thinking that she had offended the girl somehow, she blushed even more than before. "I-I'm sorry..." she averted her eyes as she continued the apology, "I didn't mean to offend you if I did." Why was Karasu-san lowering her head like that? Oh, no. The Eagle must had done something wrong. She probably had pissed her off, being too forward. That had to be it.

Great. That was just her luck. Being rejected on the first week of school by, probably, the only girl who would ever talk to her.

Shame filled the brunette as she stood up, her chair sliding back at the action, in an attempt to walk away. She might as well, right? She had already ruined any chance of having a friend in the school.

But, then, Karasu-san did something that was... well... surprising.

"That is, I don't mind." [/u][/color]

Was that... a smile? Rima's expression changed from shame to amazement in an instant. "Do you mean that?" She asked, not believing this change in character. She began to ramble in her surprise and uncertainty. "Are you sure? Like I said, I don't want to offend you, or mock you, or hurt you, or sadden you, or scare you, or--"

It was then that something caused Rima to halt listing her insecure worries.

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{{You can decide what the 'something' is, if you'd like =-) }}

[Karasu Kuroha]

This girl... So many conflicted feelings swirled within Karasu's heart. Like, dislike, annoyance, and... something else she wasn't quite sure of. "For what? You don't have anything to be sorry for. It makes you seem like a pushover, and I'm sure you don't want to come off like that." She was about to continue her rant, when she noticed the brunette's hurt expression as she walked away. Dumbfounded, she lowered her eyes. Did her careless words have that much of an impact? Somehow, now it felt like it was her fault. Her conscience wouldn't allow her to leave it. "I really don't mind, you know." she half-mumbled, in a much softer voice than before. Why did this girl have this effect on her? For the first time in a long time, The Raven felt weak and vulnerable. The rosy color of her cheeks deepened as she grew more conscious of this. Yet she found enough strength to lean forward, then grab the other girl's hand. "You're noisy." she said simply. She stayed that way for several seconds, at least until it finally seemed to register what she had just done. Quickly, she released Rima's hand and blushed. "I already told you it's no problem, so it's already decided. Got that?"

Two girls, alone in the library together. Like something out of a manga, for sure. Life could be so ironic sometimes. However, this girl's aura felt different from any of the others she'd met before. That bothered her. Unsure what to say next, an awkward silence fell over the room before she finally spoke again.

Kara averted her eyes for the time being. Thank God the librarian wasn't in right now to see that. Someone might take it the wrong way. But then... what way did she mean it, exactly? That question only gave her a headache, so Karasu put it aside for now. "What kind of books do you like? I like crime novels." If not for her mother's influence, she might even want to be a detective. Obviously she wanted to change the subject to something less awkward, but not just that. She wanted to find out more about Rima. You could tell a lot about a person by what kind of books they liked.

[Rima Washino]

"For what? You don't have anything to be sorry for. It makes you seem like a pushover, and I'm sure you don't want to come off like that." "I really don't mind, you know."

[/color]

Rima stared at Karasu, listening intently, letting it sink in. Her brown eyes grew wide in a new realisation brought by not only Karasu's words, but the way she had presented them. The way the black-haired female had made the point that she had been trying to prove, that she had been trying to cling to, all along. Rima had promised herself after her memories returned that she wouldn't be vulnerable again. That she wouldn't let someone hurt her, like James had so carelessly done. That, instead, she would be strong, that she would not allow herself to seem weak or show even the slightest bit of apology or fratility.

And, yet.... here she was. Reverting back to the fragile, naive girl of the past. Was it this girl, Karasu? Did she somehow make Rima feel this way, subliminally and unnotingly give Rima some sort of comfort that allowed her to want to feel vulnerable? Like with everything else, the brunette couldn't be sure.

Nevertheless, Rima was truly thankful towards her new aquaintance, and casted a faint smile in gratitude. "You're right." she admitted. "Thank you."

"You're noisy." "I already told you it's no problem, so it's already decided. Got that?"[/u][/color]

A vivid rose colour painted The Eagle's cheeks at the unsuspected contact as she turned to see Karasu holding her hand and... blushing? That was the second time she'd seen her blushing, now that she thought about it. What.. is she doing? Is she trying to come on to me? The brunette wondered curiously, surprisingly, not exactly sure what to make of this tactile exchange until the other spoke.

"N-Noisy?" She questioned, stammering at the start. Was that a compliement? How was she noisy? Had she been talking too loud? Or, maybe had said too much?

Then, Karasu released her hand. Rima allowed it to awkwardly dangle to the side, yet, somehow, she felt slightly disappointed by the loss of touch. She decided to sit down in order to try and shake off the uncomfortable feeling.

The yearning to continue holding the girl's hand did not cease. She silently contemplated why she even had the desire to do so in the first place. Expectantly, she couldn't arrive to an answer.

She nodded her head to Karasu in confirmation. She definately needed to stop acting so indecisive. What had happened to her aspiration of individual defense? She took the girl's hand in her own and smiled to symbolise promise, in understanding. Though, instinctively, she had been unable to resist it for some unforeseen reason. Her blush, of course, deepened as she did so. "Of course."

The silence that followed, of course, made things feel even more awkward. More uncomfortable. After a moment of notice too late, Rima finally let go of Kara-chan's hand, realising that there was no actual reason to hold it now. Her eyes glanced down, at the table, and her fingers traced etched pictures that had been boredly engraved into smooth wood. She occupied herself with various conversation topics, deciding on which one to pick until Kara-chan gratefullly had beat her to it.

"What kind of books do you like? I like crime novels."[/u][/color]

Books? Why, she adored books. This conversation topic caused her brown gaze to shift to Kara-chan and eased a magnificent smile into Rima's face. "Crime novels are interesting," She began, which, of course, was very true, "But adventurous mysteries and fantansy romances are even better!" Her exclaimation managed to slip a wink out of her that she didn't even know she owned, but she continued the conversation, nonetheless, hoping that Karasu wouldn't look too much into the gesture. Though, of course, there was something to be considered, but Rima tried her best not to dwell on the reactions and results of it. Instead, she focused on the next question at hand... "What do you like about crime novels, Kara-chan?", She wonderd, half-absently, resting her chin in her hand.

Just like Kara-chan, she wished to learn more about the girl sitting beside her. Liking genres was one thing, and it was wonderful. But, the reasons behind liking them exhibited more, as it not only presented someone's personality, but someone's perspective on the world and their aspirations in life as well.
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[Karasu Kuroha]

Wait for it... Karasu waited for the inevitable reaction to her blunt words, anger or even tears if she was really sensitive. All of a sudden, she felt a small twinge of guilt. Maybe she could have worded that slightly nicer. No, she should have. The Raven paused. Since when did she have so much empathy for others? Of course, she could sympathize with some situations, but hardly at all if the person brought it on themselves. So why is this time different, she thought, biting her lip a little. Rima's voice suddenly brought her back to reality. Her crimson eyes went wide as she listened, disbelieving. She seemed... almost grateful? Was it a trick? If so, then she must be a damn good actress.

She nodded, inhaling a little. Now that they were no longer in direct contact as they had been only seconds ago, she could relax. "Yeah. You remind me of someone I knew." There was a distant, almost pensive look in her eyes as she said this. Of course, what Rima didn't know is that 'someone' was in fact herself before she became cynical.

Fantasy. Romance. She gave a small, barely detectable twitch at those words, though the other girl had to be looking very closely to catch it. Somehow, that was exactly the kind of answer she expected from the idealistic soul in front of her. She blushed a little at the wink given to her, which she only met with rosy cheeks in return. In some ways, she really did remind Kara of her younger self, who still believed in those ideals. Strange, considering the brunette appeared to be a year above her. When exactly had she lost faith? If she had to guess... it had to be sometime close to her father's affair and the divorce that followed. Kara closed her eyes momentarily and ran her hand through her glossy black hair, then stared back at Rima with serious, almost concerned eyes. "I see. Well then, don't get too caught up in it. A perfect love doesn't exist. Because humans are imperfect by nature." She glanced back at Rima before turning. "You have to work hard for your happy ending so the universe doesn't take it away from you." Ah, Karasu, the pessimistic realist.

And the complete opposite of the girl before her. Opposites attract... maybe it wasn't total nonsense?

The blush initiated from their earlier closeness hadn't completely faded yet, so her cheeks were still faintly pink.

[Rima Washino]

"Yeah. You remind me of someone I knew."

[/u][/color]

Rima blinked, taken aback by this statement. Straight, and too the point, wasn't she? The Eagle could not help but challenge it. Question it, even though she had been aware of the pensive look in her eyes. Even though she was aware that the topic could be harmful, nerve-hitting.

Her instincts won out before she could control them. Words being said before she realised what she was saying. Before she knew she was saying them. "Yeah?" The question was curious, with a tint of courage. "Who?"

"I see. Well then, don't get too caught up in it. A perfect love doesn't exist. Because humans are imperfect by nature."[/i][/u]

And, then it hit. Like a stab wound to the soul, like a stake to the heart. Rima knew that Karasu was just being kind, just warning her, just giving her an opinion. But, somehow, it felt as if all of her values and beliefs and dreams had been crushed, stomped on, and thrown out. Her smile fell, her face fell. Is that really what the girl before her believed? That she would never find love?

Rima averted her eyes, still flustered, yet stubborn in her own right. "It's true that nobody's perfect," She stated with a small smile, "But, I still think that everyone has a special someone. I think that everyone. . . has a true love somewhere. . ." Her gaze softened, becoming saddened, reflective. Not by Karasu's words, but by memories of the past. Memories of her past relationship. She had thought she had found her perfect someone then. But, as it had happened and how everything had ended, she was fairly certain now that he hadn't been the one... that he would never be. Hers was still out there, and she had believe that she would find it. She had to believe that her dreams could be accomplished regardless of her duty as a senshi.

"You have to work hard for your happy ending so the universe doesn't take it away from you."[/u][/color]

The bruneete turned back at her new-found friend with surprised eyes, with a respect and empathetic understanding. Kara-chan's words spoke to her, and Rima at once deciphered the hidden meaning behind them. She had lost someone. Someone important. Could it... could it have been a lover, like with her own situation? She decided to find out.

"Why?" She asked boldly, "Did the universe... did it take something away from you?" It wasn't an accusation. Her eyes shone with sympathy, nearly rimming with tears as she stared at Kara-chan. Her heart sank in saddness. She knew what it felt like to lose someone, especially someone close, someone that knew you. Knew your secrets, your fears, your hopes, your dreams, and walked alongside them, supported them and upheld them with you.

Sure, Rima was the hopeless romantic, the idealistic optimist in most cases, and Karau was the skeptical romantic, the realistic pessimist. But, perhaps... Rima and Kara-chan weren't as different as they seemed. Perhaps, in a larger picture of perspectives, they had both suffered a tragic loss, and had lost something of themselves by result.

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